Being weekends

After a chat with a good friend on YM, I realized that I need something to fuel me through life.

He said I need passion, more of it to make out of life, inspired and rejuvenated. He also told me that all this while, the talk about relationships and such has not done anything but slow me down. He knows I have a hobby, but he thinks I need to do it more often.

“Photography, you like taking pictures right? I have seen some of your B&Ws. They are impressive Sarc. Why don’t you try doing that on digital instead?”

The truth has always been while I always dreamt of owning one of those sleek digi – SLRs, I also know that what I am making at the moment will not be able to accommodate that big purchase, unless I plan to starve and get myself on the bankrupt insignificants list.

Besides, I am not really good at taking pictures, but I am learning and I am still confused over the chemical measurements of photo developing.

Having a darkroom is out of the question also. At least for now.

So last night I told him that I will start a travelog. And I will start it slow, beginning with bits and pieces of exploration here in Johor. The only way to go is from your roots is it not? And I’ll start with the basics;

The Johor Zoo.

The last time I went here was when I was still a kid. Think 12 years old. I remembered being so disappointed when I did not see the lion when all of my aunties said they saw.

That was all I remembered, actually.

So for this visit, I was bent on making up for everything that I didn’t see and was unable to remember back then.

And surprise surprise, the zoo still looked like the way it did more than a decade ago.

And for some reason, I felt a bit, sad and depressed looking at the caged animals.

Maybe it was just me… kot?

These two welcomed me into the Zoo

This 'Burung Unta' does not seem to be scared of me. I don't think that is right

'Panca Sitara' parrot style

This little cutie is a;

David & Goliath

When I went to the on the other part of the zoo the first thing I noticed was the smell. It was congested and poorly kept and I as a Johorean, felt disappointed by the unkempt condition of the animals' enclosure. Is it the lack of funds, or is it the lack of professionalism in managing a zoo?

The second thing that I noticed was that the animals were 'serenaded' by RTM's horrendous radio news. No wonder the 'Orang Utan' looked bored and uninterested.

Like wha?

Overall, Saturday was a great starter for the weekends. I spent about a couple of hours at Hwa Mui like usual for breakfast. I also decided to take a walk around the area and I noticed this;

Cute Eh?

Being ‘sombong’…

A friend told me that I could look like a snob sometimes.

The kind where we encounter at colleges, the kind we would dismiss as ‘Anak Orang Kaya tak sedar diri guna duit mak bapak tapi sombong’ kind.

I was told this at a club, which I went to one day before I got sick and got an MC for (Eleh… so shoot me la).

I wasted my time dressing up in my MNG toga top and wearing my spanking new heels, only to be caught in the rain, got my toes all wet, and because it was so cold in the bar, I had to keep my hooded sleeved jacket on.

Very un-fun when you went the distance in dressing to impress just to get it all covered up voluntarily.

I felt cheated as well, because I was told DJ Jakeman (Yeah from that crap of a radio station, I shall name no names) was going to spin. For all it’s worth, when he is not playing the clichéd and boring club hits like Dre’s Next Episode and Jamelia’s Superstar, he is quite alright. But I was there until 12 frikkin’ AM and I was still tortured with 80’s music.

I am just not an 80’s person. Grooving to Madonna’s yesteryear’s hits and Rick Astley is not my idea of fun. I would be content if some Earth Wind and Fire was played, but nooo… they went for Jason Donovan instead…

You can ask Sheryl and all the glam babes who went clubbing with me. 80’s is just not my era.

Hell, no wonder I got sick after that.

If I have my way, I would smack the DJ at the consul silly and play this. But on another note, I should reserve this number at a classier joint with a crowd that knows how to appreciate it.

Well, okay, all that contributed to my not so fun side of personality. When I get bored with everything around me, I get aloof, verbally disjointed and I would ignore everyone. I am just drama like that.

My friend told me that I was positively looking like a grand snob that night. I looked bored and uninterested, and possibly a bit sick. I told him it may be that I WAS sick in the first place. The only reason why I agreed to come was because it was Awi’s birthday and being that he is one of my best friends, I had to come and wish him a happy one.

By the by, Happy Birthday you prick! Hehehe…

So to conclude, no, Sarcy is ne’er sombong nor have I ever been one. Blame it on everything else around me… hehe… keyword here is ‘could’ and ‘look’.

End of story, this post should be titled ‘Being Misunderstood’.

(Ada suara-suara sumbang in the background shouting ‘Aren’t we all!’)

Being Bleagh-y

I am a big blob of bleagh.

I was thinking about why is it that chocolate tastes like chocolate and why is it that my coffee tastes like Milo today.

And then I looked at the green packaging in the waste bin and heard a loud and annoying ‘ding! Ding! Ding!’ in my head.

Pfffbbthh!

I have strolled into the pantry, grabbed a Milo sachet thinking it was Nescafe and made myself a mug of something that I am going to throw in a bit.

Eyes are half closed, I can barely manage a squeak and I didn’t blow my hair today.

No wonder I am a big blob of bleagh.

Yesterday, I had an egg tart and a can of cola before going to bed, and I skipped my Yoga before bed.

I sat on the couch, watched the worst movie ever starring Mrs. Cruise and then decided on taking a pill because I was having a bad headache.

I knew I should not have watched that movie till the end.

Maybe it was Monday yesterday, maybe it was because everybody else was on Public Frikkin’ Holiday except yours truly, maybe it was because I am having my visit by 'Aunt Red', maybe it was just that we have had a minor emergency when smoke filled the entire CS division and somehow the smoke has contaminated our minds because frankly speaking, everyone was a bit, looney today. Almost zombified.

Or was it just me?

Being the new Sarcy

I am different.

If you have known Sarcy personally, you will just KNOW that I have changed.

I now am getting so divaesque in a way. Never go anywhere without heels. Always have make up pouch in my handbag, touching myself up in public, blow dry my hair, blowing at least some 200 bucks on a single item of clothing every month. Ironically, I have also started on my savings account, and et ceteras.

My obsession back in gear, shoes, and more of it.

On the social front, I have been getting date requests from men. I have a third date coming up with a guy who is alright but not quite my taste this weekend. I only said yes, because he is fun to talk to.

I am still seeing Phil, every weekend. We enjoy spending our time together. And unlike my last drab of a relationship, we go to movies more often and instead of freaking over the time, I let it flow. Plus, both of us love to cook and to eat whatever we cooked at the huge balcony of his apartment unit overlooking the sea.

It is still not a relationship though, don’t get it wrong. It is merely a friendship. We like to be in each other’s company. Plus it’s alright for us if one of us could not make it for the weekend.

There will always be another time, and other people to go out with.

I have been in touch with a few of my PR posses these past few weeks. I call them, making lunch appointments, meet up for drinking sessions and constantly making room for new ones in our group.

Family wise, I talked to my Mum more and I stayed at home more on weeknights too. It used to be spent with my ex, which I now see as me being stupid. I ACTUALLY enjoy staying at home and would be contented with my remote and stacks of DVDs, a huge mug of juice and a whole pack of Twisties!

And when I do go out, I go out with friends for drinks, Mamak or just coffee (Irregardless of the rumor that Starbucks Tak Halal. Hell, I can spread the same thing about Chilli’s also if I want.)

My life is so much more fulfilled, I feel.

Of course there were times when I would feel miserable, and just, demotivated but in the end, hey ho, there’s always something to look out for in life, and life is only what you make of it.

All the sudden, I am feeling smurfy. (Read; not blue but happy, joyous, 'jubilated', in a kiddish kind of way)

Being spooked by an inconvenient truth

Recently, post global warming conference in Australia, Sydney dimmed its’ skyline for a whole hour.

This is mainly because Australia is going to be one of the countries that will be greatly affected by the climate shift caused by global warming. The upside is the northern hemisphere is going to enjoy better crops, the bad news is that right here in the Asian plain, things are looking dreary.

We have potentials of massive floods, earthquakes of unspeakable magnitude, Tsunamis and more frequent bush fires. The weather will be chaotic with sudden thunder storms and what nots in some part of the continent.

Global warming will also indirectly contribute to the extinction of a few species of animals. This is due to the rapid change of weather and climate. Polar bears could be under the list of extinct species in a few years time. It is already in the endangered species list.

This together with the amount of political tension in the Middle East, nuclear warheads in Pakistan and North Korea, it’s definitely something to be thought about aside from our early morning woman crisis of what to wear to work.

Locally, we are already seeing the signs. The weather nowadays is scorching hot in the afternoon, and raining cats and dogs in the late evening. Johoreans are now a paranoid bunch. If the rain does not stop in 24 hours, people will scramble around to save their belongings, in case a flood occurs in the next 24.

I told off my Dad, yes my DAD for open burning. He has this habit of burning all of the dead leaves on our yard every evening. Everytime he does that, I will come out from the house and nag. I mean, it’s the one thing that a woman does best, no?

“Daddy!! Jangan bakar selalulaaaa… tak bagusla. Be environmental friendly sikitla!”

“Someone will have to get rid of the heap of rubbish here!”

“Dad, these are dauns ok? It will decompose sooner or later la. Besides it gives me smoke smell on my hair la!”

My Dad does not get the whole open burning = global warming = big flood concept. All he knows is that his grandpa’s dad’s dad and so forth have been doing the same thing for generations and we are still here decades after.

But I do. And I am spooked by the whole devastation that it will bring if we don’t do something about it.

I am starting small. For a few years now, we separate our trash, minimize consumption of water and electricity, I quit smoking, I dug out holes to bury all the dead leaves so that my dad will not have the chance to burn it.

You know, little things. Who knows I might even join a conservation program group one day.

Now if only there are at least a hundred of like minded people out there, and multiply that with a few thousands and multiply it with a few more, perhaps in time we could really make a difference.

Being Single

Some friends doubted that I will stay on being single for the rest of the year.

I am a magnet, they said. Now all the more. Men just find me appealing. For some reason, my button nose and my uncaring attitude attracts. Never mind that I have issues, I just, attract.

That’s why men just approach me almost everywhere. In the book store, while waiting for the elevator, while having my solo lunch etc…

In my honest opinion, I am more of a bastard magnet rather. All the men I met after I lost Trey could be summed up as bastards through and through.

The story of my life, sob… sob… ceh!

Anyway, I find it irritating to mope about being single. One of my girlfriends does that all the time. She whined about not having anybody to hug, to confide in, to have emotional connection with.

I told her to go and get laid and have a fling.

She told me I am so preposterous, I am almost a man.

Look, if you want to be happy, to be emotionally connected and all that girly shit, I think the first thing that you’ll have to do is to verify to yourself that you are able to be happy and have fun, alone, by yourself.

We don’t need a dick to make us happy. Well, for all it’s worth, I think sex is over rated, and the best orgasm I had was NOT with a man, but with a little battery operated device.

So whoever coined the concept of ‘want to be happy? Get a man’ is seriously retarded.

Here’s my take on it. Want to be happy? Forget, get yourself together, surround yourself with good friends, have good food, good conversation, expect nothing, have fun, relax, buy a vibrator, get a hobby and open your mind.

Being single is not to hate all things testosterone. Being single is to get in touch with the part of you that you have lost for sometime when you were still stuck in an oblivion called ‘a relationship’.

And if sparks fly, chemistry sizzles and the feeling’s right, you may choose to jump in the couple pool and enjoy it.

This is only my 5 cents worth (RIght now I don't carry 1 cents coins). SIngledom, live it up!

Weird Trait No 7...

Mystery of the week…

The drawer.

I was pretty sure I closed it before going to bed that night, so when on Sunday morning I found the frikkin’ thing pulled open, I was, puzzled.

So Akak dengan muka pelik baru bangun tidur walked over to the door, thinking that maybe someone came in searching for something in that drawer, though that’s another question altogether as to why that person should search for whatever it was they were looking for in my lingerie / undies part of the cabinet.

The door was locked.

So makhluk ghaib mana yang saja nak scare me out of my wits, I will never know. To be very honest, I don’t want to know.

The last time something weird happened in my room was about several months ago. I woke up to a very disturbing banging and scratching sound in my cupboard at 3.00 AM in the morning. The sound seemed to be made by something with wings and talons, big ones. It went on for about 20 minutes before it stopped.

I was standing in front of the cupboard weighing my decision on whether or not I should open it to find out or otherwise. I decided not to and went to sleep.

My friends remarked that it could be a trapped bird, or bat.

The thing was, I just straighten out my wardrobe that very evening. NOTHING was trapped, no flying thingamajiy whatsoever.

When I was in my previous company, I was always the last one to leave the office (Being the ‘productive’ member of the division la kan.) the office was well lit, most of the time there would be two of us in the office at that time, the thing was we could not see each other from our desks, so I would have no idea if he decided to leave the office.

One day, I just happened to walk past the guy’s desk on my way out and I shouted a casual bye, which he replied.

The next day I bumped into him in the pantry.

“Weih… yesterday what time you go back?”

“Yesterday I went back early la babe. Got wedding anniversary. 6 PM chiow already.”

“Don’t play la dude! I saw you around 8 PM la.”

“Honest to God, you can ask M***** if you don’t believe me.”

After that I was still the last one to leave, just that I never talked to anyone when I left the office.

Thanks to my ‘3rd eye’ or whatever, I seemed to be more in touch with ‘The Others’ more than anyone in my family. I am able to feel and see things that normal people wouldn’t usually be able to. It’s a freaky ability that I wish I don’t have. I have had more dramatic encounters, a guy sewing himself up at the entrance of a morgue, a faceless spirit standing in front of my desk when I was in school, a guy trying to stop a bus with his detached head…

The list goes on, but let me just leave it at that.

If you think it is cool for me to have this ‘gift’, I am more than glad to transfer it to you for your own enjoyment. I am already weird as it is, I don’t need any additional weird factors to set me apart from anybody else.

Any takers?