Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Yes.. I do have a fucking trucker's mouth... Do you mind?

During my recent Handstand (Ardha Mukho Vrksasana) practice, as usual, I thud down on my mat very gracelessly.

Under my breath, I said... *Fuck*.

Guruji was smiling as he passed by.

I know that he heard that.

When I first uttered the vulgar word in yoga, I felt a sense of shame. Guilt.. if you can call it that.

I am trying to live my life by the yoga principles of the 8 limbs.

Yes, the word being... 'Trying'.

And so, after some time, and a lot of meditation, I concluded that if I stop swearing, I would lose a part of me. The part that made me, the me I am in love with.

So far, I have met two paradox definition of how a yogi is supposed to be.

My 2nd Guruji used the word fuck in almost all of his sentences. Aussie was so glad that I can construct a full sentence using the F word, that he hugged me.

Aussie was just glad that I am not trying to be holy, divine. Yogic-ally speaking.

Besides, there is just something about the F word that is not quite explainable. It's the delight of being able to say that word without a single worry.

It's absofuckinglutely enlightening to be able to swear like a sailor.

So, please do not expect me, or if you have any friends who practices yoga, to be talking to you like we are the epitome of a Goddess in Lululemon yoga pants. Some of us are edgier than you expect.

With love, Namaste.

Ayu

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