What would you do when you discover that you click with someone, he might just be the soulmate you are looking for and that someone is hundreds and thousands of miles away?
I never believed in long distance relationship. It sits right next to love at first sight. I just don't have much faith in things that sounds a bit... far fetched. Long distance is far fetched.
I have many times tried to dabble in long distance relationship. When the last of it kind of just, went down like that, I decided that this theory was tried and tested as something that would never work.
I wouldn't think twice about moving to another country because of work. However when it comes to moving to another country because of someone or to put it in an even cornier way, because of 'love', I have my reservations.
I mean, I couldn't even make a relationship that I am involved in physically here work, how in the fucking hell can I make something work without me physically being there? Regardless if the two of us really are gung - ho about making it work, I still think that it is a bit too far fetched. It is something that I am not willing to try, subconsciously.
There's this what if thing reeling over and over again in my head about this.
What if I decided one day to leave everything I have here to move to a strange country to be with someone and then found out that things are not going to work out and somehow, I wake up alone and miserable and regretting my decision and having to live with that decision now that it didn't work?
I am not the kind of person who would sacrifice my wellbeing just to go berserk and romantic. There was always an underlying reason why I do certain things. I moved to KL in the first place because of the career opportunity. Along with that, I was in a so called relationship with a bastard (well now I know he is one) and was at the same time trying to make 'that' work.
Strangest thing about that was that, I decided to call that shit off because it seemed we drifted away from each other more now that I was physically at the same location. I took it in my stride when I discovered that the thing we thought we had was really a big sodding joke and I was wasting my time trying to make it work.
At the end of it all, I never regretted moving up to KL. My career jumped off, I made some personal decision and is physically changing myself and I have a more open approach to things in general. I found out who are my friends and who are not and I am glad I did.
But then, loneliness makes one do very, unpredictable actions. I don't know. I will just leave it to fate for this one. *Shrugs*