Monday, February 5, 2007

Random thoughts-4 days before the birthday.

I came up with a conclusion last evening while having my alcohol fix at Coffee Trap yesterday.

That I am happier single. That I am happier when I don’t care.

So that said, I am going to be happier, single and uncaring.
--

I lost a whopping 3 kg for last week alone!

It could be due to me not having breakfast and dinner nowadays. I would prefer to go straight to sleep after my shower at night not before chatting with friends on my laptop. My friend sent me a job vacancy with one of the huge organizations in KL.

Dear Babe,

You might want to give this a try. We need someone like you here in KL.

Consider it please.

Hugs and Kisses, Cher.

I would have applied, except that my contract tenure here has not expired yet.
--
Yesterday was not one of my good ones. One of my articles was rejected because it was too ‘politically’ controversial that it might give space for a lawsuit. I told the editor of the magazine I am currently free lancing for that I am in no state of mind to come up with a ‘happy’ article right now. I am brooding and I am emotionally a mess.

“Go get laid and then come up with something good.” She said, jokingly.

Am I so slutty that I would need a good fuck to come up with a ditzy happy feel good article?

I feel so dirty and perverted all of the sudden.
--
Phil, my fling, called me up during my solo beer session. He was in Singapore for a meeting for the whole week, and according to him, he was thinking of me, and the things I said during our weekend rendezvous.

“Like not calling me all the time? Let me warn you that if you don’t stop all this calling me on weekdays I am going to stop taking your phone calls altogether.”

“Don’t take it out on me just because your last relationship was fucked up Sarc. I am just trying to be there for you. You don’t want to keep on thinking about the bugger right? I bet he is not even thinking of you right now. He will not be concerned even if you decided to jump down a roof because of him. He’s got a new bitch, and you have got yourself a new bastard, if that’s what you would like me to be. Just face that fact.”

… or something like that rather… there was a whole lot more words than I remembered to put up there but I thought that the words that I used pretty much summed up everything he meant to say.

I guessed, I must have sounded harsh. I did feel that tinge of guilt having put him down like that, but I don’t want to think about it further. A man, or a bastard is not on my agenda right now. He would be better off without me, and I would be better off without him.

He didn’t call me back, and I didn’t call him.

Time to either go celibate or go find another weekend fling.

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