Thursday, February 15, 2007

Arrested Development

Sarcy’s not maternal, and that is it. Sarcy is not family oriented either and would rather spend her time alone than with her family.

That is a fact.

Subconsciously, when I told the many exes I had that all I wanted was a long term relationship with no promise of a marriage whatsoever was because I don’t want to be in any position to have a kid or a family.

And it’s not that the idea of someone who is willing to go down on their knees pleading with a diamond ring doesn’t appeal to me, but I am beginning to think that I will not have the chance of going through all that like how other women would.

As for my maternal instincts, I have had experiences whereby I happened to be in touch with it. Overwhelming hormonal imbalance made me think about having a baby, even getting married and be a housewife, sometimes. Thankfully, that selfish, arrogant and repulsive side of me comes knocking just in time to wake me up.

See, I grew up tending to my younger siblings. I cooked for them, iron their uniforms and during those times when they were still potty training, I will always be the one who my Mum would shout at to make sure that everything is taken care of. Since both of my parents were working, I was the one who had to make sure that everything was taken care of at home, lest I want a good scolding from my Mum for not getting things done. Though, I would get one even when everything was done.

At the age of 12, I begin to wonder why was my life different from my classmates who had it all easy and why didn’t I have the luxury to not be shouted at half of the time. I was never cuddled, was never hugged and was never kissed. When I did get that kind of attention from my aunts, I felt awkward and would usually move away.

As a result of that, I was aching to get out of the house. At the age of 15, I went away to a boarding school, much to my Mum’s disapproval and when I reached 19, I moved to KL and stayed there for 4 years. I came back because I decided on becoming a part of them.

It is not working.

I do love my family, but we are different. I don’t think like they do, and I like my privacy. Mine is not so much dysfunctional because I think I am actually the dysfunctional one in the family. I am unable to connect with them, my flesh and blood.

Sometimes I told myself that if I am ever going to have kids, (Or one), I will not treat them the way I was treated, in hopes that things would turn out to be different. I would not want to make another me.

Sometimes, I would just decide to not have any, save me the unnecessary pain.

Most times, I would just leave it to God. Whatever goes.

No comments:

Post a Comment