The last time I checked, I am single.
At least that’s what I think. When a casual datewhom you went out with once like a month ago actually calls you more than 2 times a day, what do you call that?
I call it loathsome.
Calling me darling is not a good idea too. But being the polite person that I have always been, I entertain anyway, taking care to not exceed the 5 minutes limit talk time. Afterall, there’s not much that I could answer to a question as uninteresting as ‘Dah makan ke belum?’ after break fast.
I have checked and double checked if I have a huge ‘L’ for ‘Loser & Lame’ sign on my forehead. Nope, not there.
I regretted going out on a date with this one. Not only was he totally not my type (About my height, talks about his car and his ‘position’ (Yes position eh.) all the frikkin’ time and use the word gonna and wanna more than anyone should), he speaks English (Grammatically incorrect English) with an accent too. The punchline came when he told me he studied in Australia for a good 5 years, to which I sarcastically responded with, “And that didn’t do you much good did it?”.
And here’s the thing, he didn’t get what I meant! 5 years in Australia ya’ll!
“Mana la kau dapat baluk ni Noks?” (Where do you get this guy babe?) A asked me during our Starbucks after buka trip.
“A friend of a friend. What, you expect him to stroll up to me and impress me with an original pick up line or even a conversation? Unlikely.”
He called me yesterday after break fast. I was at my grandparents’ house and I just let my O2 rip like nobody’s business.
“Kenapa tak angkat phone Kak Sarc?” (Why don’t you pick up your phone?) my cousin asked, I smiled and said I don’t answer work calls on weekends.
I never had work calls. Not one for this whole one year I have been with this company.
To put it in Malay about what I think of the whole situation, ‘Rasanya makan kuih apam free ni lagi bermakna dari cakap dengan orang yang cakap tak tentu hala ni.’ (I’d rather eat this free food than talk with someone who is pointless.)
Ahh Crap, my phone is ringing. *holds breath while checking the number… OH Fucking NO!*
At least that’s what I think. When a casual datewhom you went out with once like a month ago actually calls you more than 2 times a day, what do you call that?
I call it loathsome.
Calling me darling is not a good idea too. But being the polite person that I have always been, I entertain anyway, taking care to not exceed the 5 minutes limit talk time. Afterall, there’s not much that I could answer to a question as uninteresting as ‘Dah makan ke belum?’ after break fast.
I have checked and double checked if I have a huge ‘L’ for ‘Loser & Lame’ sign on my forehead. Nope, not there.
I regretted going out on a date with this one. Not only was he totally not my type (About my height, talks about his car and his ‘position’ (Yes position eh.) all the frikkin’ time and use the word gonna and wanna more than anyone should), he speaks English (Grammatically incorrect English) with an accent too. The punchline came when he told me he studied in Australia for a good 5 years, to which I sarcastically responded with, “And that didn’t do you much good did it?”.
And here’s the thing, he didn’t get what I meant! 5 years in Australia ya’ll!
“Mana la kau dapat baluk ni Noks?” (Where do you get this guy babe?) A asked me during our Starbucks after buka trip.
“A friend of a friend. What, you expect him to stroll up to me and impress me with an original pick up line or even a conversation? Unlikely.”
He called me yesterday after break fast. I was at my grandparents’ house and I just let my O2 rip like nobody’s business.
“Kenapa tak angkat phone Kak Sarc?” (Why don’t you pick up your phone?) my cousin asked, I smiled and said I don’t answer work calls on weekends.
I never had work calls. Not one for this whole one year I have been with this company.
To put it in Malay about what I think of the whole situation, ‘Rasanya makan kuih apam free ni lagi bermakna dari cakap dengan orang yang cakap tak tentu hala ni.’ (I’d rather eat this free food than talk with someone who is pointless.)
Ahh Crap, my phone is ringing. *holds breath while checking the number… OH Fucking NO!*
the cool thing about it is that u go on dates. i mean... the guys can be such loser la kan sometimes but u at least go out on dates and for that girl, i salute u.
ReplyDeleteeh, 5 years in oz is ok what.. they have those combined degrees tau. last time i had an intern who did mech eng + econs.. total (expected) study time was 5 years..
ReplyDeletemaybe he's one of those?
no? ah well.. just thought i'd try..
ops *guilty mode is on*. Sounds like someone I know..hehe. Want me to kick his ass for you?
ReplyDeleteMs D,
ReplyDeletelaaaa.. who did you think i was talking about.. bukanla noks, not that one... he is a sweetie, almost too gooda for this hot wild chick babeh! this one is a wanker, a Johorean. Johorean guys are all lame la kot...
hehe..get your claws ready babe! nanti sure dapat hate mails dari the male johoreans..
ReplyDeleteMS D,
ReplyDeleteeh... ler.r.. forgot your hubby orang Muor. mintak maap bebanyak noks!!!!
hehe... so kelakar...
ReplyDelete5 yrs in Australia dulu dia speaking apa, eh? Bahasa Aborigines?
ReplyDeleteShould you decide to have another date with him (which i'm sure you shouldn't), please recommend him to read this book:
What Not To Write: A guide to the DOs and DON'Ts of good English.
ISBN: 9789810578879
hiihihhiih, sarcy ade peminat :P
ReplyDeleteWhoah... 5 yrs in Oz... dia buat apa tu?
ReplyDeleteinn,
ReplyDeletei see dates as a way of discovering your won tolerance level.
and nobody wants to be alone wot, and you can never find anyone of you dont meet anyone could you? :)
Des,
apa ko merapek la setan?? if he actually has a combined degree, i pengsan la... how can that be?!!!
DNAS,
ReplyDeleteyelah tu kot..
waaaaa... siap ada publication serial no lagi tuh... woohoo.. nangis kalau i SMS kat dia nanti kan.. ihiks
Beskot,
kelakar? you would have gone red trying to hold in your laugh just listening to him talk!
Lilith,
Eeeks... owh tidakkkk!!
Sheryl,
ReplyDeletebuat bodo la tuh kot...
so hari ni dah baper kali he called?muehehehhh :P
ReplyDeletehari ni berapa kali beb?
ReplyDeleteTiena,
ReplyDeleteonce at 11 am, and then 3pm and then 6PM. SMSes dah beribu dah.
Izham,
umm.. ghasanya dalam 4 kali but i didnt pick up la. SMses dah tak terkira...layan sekali sekala... bleh?
Since he didn't get your sarcasm, he might never get your not-answering-his-call mode as well. Maybe it's time to give it to him point blank, politely of course, coz there's no telling how psychotic people can be these days.
ReplyDeleteAgus,
ReplyDeletei am changing my phone number soon, first in years.
and there's no chance in hell that i am going to give it to him.
weh, where got setan? ni bulan posa tau? all the setans masuk jail.
ReplyDeletestranger things have happened you know? bapak dia loaded tak? if yes then it's not impossible for him to have degrees. plus, they give degrees on all kinds of subjects these days.
EH DES,
ReplyDeletei dont want to know anything about him, he is that bad okeh, so i dont want to even know ifhe has parents or not. dah lah ngokngek, berlagak pulak tuh! dont wantto eat humble pie la this one. campak dengan pie adalah.
walauweh... marah siot... that guy must be really really hopeless..
ReplyDeleteDes,
ReplyDeleteword. tak marah, annoyed sahaja.