Monday, June 10, 2013

On Paranoia and Priority

Recently, I received a comment from an unknown reader who asked me 'stuff' about my lifestyle.

I requested for the reader to email me as the questions were a bit too personal for me to address on the blog.

My best friend then asked me how did I answer the email.

I said, vaguely.

He reminded me to be careful. It might be the moral police, searching for people who refused to be a part of the flock. People like me.

Or it may be people like the blogger whose one objective in life, once upon a time ago, was to talk bad about other bloggers who never actually gave a damn about him/her, but was so affected that they had to shut down their blog, just because some A- hole thinks it's their God Given Duty to become a virtual douche bag.

It's all good. I am aware of the illusion of 'freedom of speech' on the world wide web.

It would be inaccurate for us to assume that we have more freedom of speech elsewhere.

Again, freedom itself is a subtle illusion.

Even the state of anarchy itself is not exactly... freedom.

Well, I hope that the reader I advised was genuine. In all earnestness, in this age of paranoia, there are things that you will have to do to retain your sense of self.

In this case, I will have to walk the talk, to stay true to my own principles in life. Because without these, I am better off dead.

---

One time ago, I got to know this guy from the internet.

I did write about online dating, so this was one of those online 'dating recipients' that I came across.

Let me reiterate that not all people who chose online dating, is desperate. They might just want to have some virtual fun, to throw caution to the wind and just... see what can happen from there.

I don't really do it that often nowadays but let me get back to this one guy I corresponded with but is unlikely ever going to physically meet.

He is an Australian, who was here to expand his business from Indonesia to KL.

Out of boredom, I told him that if he wants to meet up for coffee, I will be available for a period of time.

He never replied and so I assumed that he was busy, which he did reply 2-3 hours after saying that he was knackered.

The next day, he messaged me with  a single hi. I said hi back. I received no response for over 4 hours.

I casually messaged him saying that, he didn't have to maintain contact to be polite, that it is ok for him to just drop me off.

And then he started messaging me, suggesting that we meet for coffee. It was a Sunday, which is my 'rice day' with my best friend, which I never will reschedule. Not for someone I don't even know.

And then, he accused me of not being straight, of being the one who makes excuses.

I decided, there and then, I don't have time for this shit. And cut him off.

As you know, I am kind of on a long distance thing with Aussie, who decided to pursue his yoga lessons in India for a year. We decided to let go of commitment to each other, but is still in contact with each other nevertheless, bearing in mind that if we are still in contact a year from now, then maybe, we can take it to the next level.

Aussie respects my schedule and my routine. It helps that we kind of share the same routine. In a way, yoga helps us both to have that sense of balance.

And respect.

If this 'thing' goes to the next level, I will be happy. However, I am already happy to be given an opportunity to meet him in this life time.

With Love, Namaste.

Ayu




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