Trying To Breath a Change

Suffocating…

It’s as if the air was stripped from all the O2. I felt terrible, my heart rates rising, my pulse heightening and my adrenaline’s rushing like no one’s business.

I hate this.

I shouldn’t have picked up that call.

Dammit!
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Yesterday, I drove all the way to Coffee Trap, for my beer. Did I mention someone took my money? What was left of it anyway. Now, I am broke. At least a beer here cost me about 11 bucks. Trying to survive on 50 bucks for the whole month… thank god for my credit card me say, at least the petrol will always be filled.

It’s almost 8 pm and somehow, sitting there alone made me think about what the new year of 2007 has brought me thus far.

A failed relationship, a renewed friendship with another ex, a fling who actually likes spending time with me (And someone whom I am still trying to avoid) a realization that I give less credit than I should to my friends around me, a discovery that I could indeed survive on my own without my family, the homecoming of a best friend, a new lease on life, a new spirit… most of all.

I am expecting more things to come. I have drive now. everyday I would go to the more sophisticated area in my housing estate, where all the bungalows are at, asking myself how did they do it, and thinking of how to get it. I believe I should dream, bigger than I have had. I am starting small, and that’s by changing my habits, trying to stay positive.

Men could wait, honestly. I will just have them as side dishes now (Not that I am trying to make you guys sound like mashed potatoes, but you guys are. :P)

So it’s just going to be single horny me for the rest of the year then. I’ll drink to that.

‘Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.’
(Albert Schweitzer – 1875 – 1965)