A moment to ponder...

I have not seen Phil since last Thursday.

When I picked him up from the airport, the first thing I did when he came into the car was to hand him the T&Co cuff links I bought sometime ago. It was intended for BF(ex). Now I don’t think it is relevant anymore to be handed over to him.

I was so excited when I got my hands on the cuffs. I wanted so much to make the then love of my life happy, to make him feel important and appreciated.

But jinxed January and February did not permit that to happen, I guess.

That night I got up from his bed in a hurry to go home. I freaked out when he hugged me from behind and started kissing my ears and my neck, softly, affectionately.

I threw on my cardie and said goodbye without giving him a chance to kiss me.

I don’t intend to let go of the chance for me to turn my life around. Getting involved with a man has never been good to me. It has almost always scar me for life. I am determined to stop being vulnerable.

I just want to be happy, and I could get that when I am alone, worrying only for myself and nothing else.

The next time I am going to T&Co, it is to buy myself something, and never for anybody else.