Monday, January 19, 2015

Go with the flow

Things change according to the circumstances you are in.

Take my current  situation for an example. I am unemployed and have limited wage choices. I have money out, but meagre money in. I made adjustments, telling credit card companies that I will only be able to make the minimum payment and downgraded my broadband usage plan from 350/month to less than 200/month. I no longer drink Starbucks as often as I did, and I cooked my own food.

I am not saying that I won't be employed soon (It depends on whether I am brave enough to take another chance, after the whole 'Sucky Job' catastrophe), but, some things have to change.

Looking back, because I was depressed and unhappy, a big chunk of my salary went to impulsive buys. I once went all out and spent RM 1000 plus on clothes in ZARA.

Artificial happiness lasts anywhere between 1 second to about 60 seconds. After that, dragging those gorgeous heels to work was still a chore.

The only few good things about that experience was I now have nice dresses, shoes and lingerie, I know how the Disputes process works and I know that I need to be happy to be productive. If out of 10 months of work, and that was all the positives that you are getting out of a job, it's time for your to leave and move the fuck on.

I used to tell myself that my unhappiness was secondary. I kept on telling myself that, most people are not happy with their job, but they stay at it anyway. Why can't I do the same?

Well, the problem is, I know how a 'happy job' feels like. So when something sucks, it sucked.

My problem is juvenile at best, but on an individual level, it is a major achievement for me to use the balls I don't physically have and make the exit, and I am quite proud of myself that I stayed on until my last day.

I exited--- Properly.

And that alone showed that for a rebel, I am professional in every sense.


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