I love my life

Yes, I do. In all seriousness, I do.

Sure it might seemed like a drab at times. I wake up when everyone else is returning from work, I go to work when everyone else is going to sleep and I go home when everyone else is stuck in traffic jams racing to the office.

"How do you do it?"

Really? You want to know?

My blood pressure is lower simply because I don't battle incessant traffic jams to work. I have flexible working hours (Technically, it is fair as I am on duty even in my sleep). I work from home every Mondays and Fridays and I can even schedule my hours to be in the office for 12 hours in a row.

And then there is the matter of keeping fit. I am a Yoga convert, but that doesn't mean that I don't love doing hardcore weights and cardios. I love sweating, simply because I don't sweat much.

Of course, I love the fact that I don't have to wait in the sidelines for a man (Or anyone, really) to get me what I want. I want to cut my hair, I cut it. I want a leather Coach bag... heck... I go and get it. I want a yoga retreat Bali holiday, I plan one. I want to drink wine, I go and get a bottle of good red and guzzle it from the bottle or sip it like a lady, with my feet up on the couch...

Aside from waking up alone and the occasional breakdowns of unknown origins (imagine me waking up sobbing and at the same time saying; 'Why the fuck am I crying... I hate myself for crying... dammit Sarc... what the fuck is fucking wrong with you!!' (Yes... I do have a terrible case of a trucker's mouth)), I love my life.

You should too... *Winks.

I am in a phase

I was told that my blog entries are now getting shorter and shorter.

So much so that they told me that I am actually better off tweeting, which I will never do (1 ; I have difficulties understanding the concept, 2; I think Facebook already taken care of my narcissistic tendencies)

Truthfully, my writing skills (except when it comes to authoritarian style emails to my colleagues and staff) has deteriorated over the course of time.

To begin with, I am not even a good writer. I only 'seemed' to write good because I used to be passionate, about maybe heartbreaks and soppy life's misadventures. I can write back then because I also happen to mix around with eccentric people.

Middle aged men who still club and act like they are 21 and confusing ladies with somewhat degenerate preferences (case in note : my blonde streaked SPG with darker than tanned artificial skin).

Now, I rarely club and when I do, it is a once in a blue moon event, I go out mostly with my close friends and when I do go out with men, it all came out disastrous. I used to be interested in going on dates and now, I wouldn't even know what to talk about during dates. Is the whole 'I want to know you better' still work? Honestly, I am getting quite sick of getting to know people better at this point. Mediocre dates has thrown me off. Plus... I am officially no longer concerned if the men I went out with called me or not after a forgettable date (Or one that was interesting even.)

So I have somewhat almost zero bitching to do, and also zero concern about anything that I used to be so concerned with. At the moment, my concern revolves more on work, my career plans and other peoples' career plan because I believe it is my duty to do so.

Once in a while though I do think about certain subjects that would probably make a suitable blog entry. I remembered how I was so emotionally motivated with various relationship issues that really didn't make any kind of bloody sense at all.

It was dumb. What's dumber was that I was not really doing anything about it.

Now, I am in a better place. Actually I felt like a brand new person. I feel more alive alone than how I was when I 'had' someone. I look better and I am actually doing well.

If I can multitask at work, buy a handbag worth 1000 bucks at a snazzy designer label and run on the treadmill for 20 minutes straight (I can't even manage a 2 mins jog before this), there is no telling what I can accomplish in the future.

So maybe I will blog more and longer about stuff when something out of the ordinary happens to me. Like if I am going to fall in love again, when I would, again, try to make sense of being in a relationship and to actually have sarcasm free opinion on the institution of marriage.

Maybe...

I need...

A slow cooker... because at the moment, I am cooking stews the old fashioned way... that would be by making sure that the stew slowly cooks on low heat and stirring the stew every 10 minutes. 

And a microwave. 

Because Joyce doesn't fancy me eating the pies she cooked straight from the fridge. She would be asking me to heat it up in the oven / she would offer to do that for me. 

Me... I am ... not really the kind of person who is privy to heating things up using the oven. 

Today

Before my work officially starts at 10.30 pm (Damn daylight savings!).

I am feeling lethargic and a wee bit fed up.

I think I need at least a break. No?

One can wish... *sighs**

The day I ...

... came to term that things would just be the way that I actually think it is going to be.

I have always thought that my NSA and I would never have anything beyond what we have right now. When we snuggle with each other everytime we are together, yes... for a split second I was thinking how nice it would be like to do that with him everyday. To wake up with him, with a smile on my face.

Not gonna kid myself any longer, it just get too tiring. Harboring hope is tiring.

And then I just resolved that I don't actually want it. Like how I sabotaged my previous relationships, even making myself believe that I was NOT the cause of the break ups.

Same damn thing. I was breaking up the relationship because in actuality, I never really wanted it in the first place.

I guess the reason why I said that I will try it out with Mr. Probably -Would -Be - Boyfie - Husband-If -It-Works-That-Is was because somehow, I kind of KNOW that it would not actually... work?


I don't know, I might be wrong, and God knows how I have been wishing that I am wrong so many times. 


At the moment, I have always been oddly... right.


Haish!

Saturday

Snapshots

Uuuu... Phone call...

Joyce : Where are you? 

Me : Waiting at the workshop with Krishna for his car to be done.

Joyce : Why????

Me : Because... unfortunately, he is my friend... *sigh*** You know that he is hairy? And now sweaty.

Me : And now he is a Tamil movie hero.

Joyce : Really?

Me : Totally.

Me : And now, he is imitating a gorilla.

Me : Where are you?

Joyce : Warehouse sale. Zara at RM 10 bucks!!!

Me : Waah... Krishna's smiling now. I think it's the promo for a new Tamil movie.

Okay, so I am no bikini model but everyone should stop smoking. Yes.. given that all of us will die some day, smokers and non - smokers alike, but hey, at least non - smokers smell better.

By this time, I am so tired, I could sleep at the sidewalks if I can.

---

I have gone to many overpriced salon asking for this haircut. All of them had these things to say to me :

Salon at OU that charged me RM 61 bucks for a boring haircut, a wash and a blow ;

"... Your face is round and this cut won't look good on you. And your hair (Twirls my hair a few times) is not suitable for this cut. You will have to relax the hair. Relaxing cost 200 over. I don't want to cut your hair this short wor... you won't look nice."

Salon at the Curve ;

"... Miss ahh.. you must rebond your hair if you want to cut this short wor. Right now, we have offer, rebond and treatment at 250 ringgit."

Dumb asses.

Then one day, Heima brought me to a salon in Uptown DU and I just said :

"Lao Pan (Boss), I want a drastic change. Kasi potong!"

" CAN!"

I settled for something that was longer, but then I asked the boss if I can go shorter, and he said ;

"YESS. Of course. But not too short, but shorter than this... CAN..."

So in the end I ended up with this cut hairstyle.

It's liberating to know that I spent less than 3 minutes to towel dry, blow and style my hair after having spent almost half an hour everyday with my medium long hair.

And this hair cut, with shampoo (Ok, the next time I go there, I am definitely going to ask for another shampoo boy as the last shampoo boy I had was rather sloppy) and blow dry cost me :

RM 45

Amazing! 

(Should see my face when I heard the price! After been paying RM 100 over for hair cuts, this is a pleasant change!)